Apr
4
2010
ep. 5: My Xtracycle Radish Tour Begins!!! Bike Highway One to the William Penn House in DC
Vlog #5 – Finally!! All the prep work is done, the kickoff shows are all played. I get on my Xtracycle Radish and begin my journey to Boston. First leg of the journey: Ashland to DC on Bike Highway One for a show at The William Penn House. Difficulties in biking through the Quantico military base. Question of the day: How do you coax your inner child to quit whining? (responses in the comment section below)
Join me for a part of my ride:
http://bit.ly/cgaJzv
How to get through Quantico on your Bike:
http://bit.ly/cSS7lg
April 5th, 2010 at 4:33 pm
It is great to follow your journey.
I wouldn’t argue with a child, just let the voice go in one ear and out the other. Keep singing “inhale exhaust, exhale love.” I think he/she will get weaker and weaker when you stop paying attention to him/her.
April 6th, 2010 at 9:19 am
Well, I do know from experience that yelling at the whiney child doesn’t work – the kid may shut-up, but will then find other passive aggressive ways to sabotage the effort.
Little kids are easily distracted though – when they’re whining in the car on a long trip, the classic response is a car game – find the alphabet on signs, sing every song you know that has a certain word in it, etc.
another trick that has helped me when hiking the AT, is to focus on smaller goals instead of the larger overwhelming one. I’d tell my whiney child “come on, you can make it to that tree up there – OK good job, now see if you can make it to that tree there, and so on… and after a while, some kind of second or third or fourth wind kicks in and the whiney child is feeling proud of himself for acting so strong and so grownup.
On the other hand, there comes a point with any child, when you get beyond games and tricks and there’s total meltdown and you simply have to stop and listen to what they’re saying. Best to not get to that situation – best to know your kid’s limits well enough so as to avoid meltdowns.
On the other hand, as Wm. Blake said “You never know what is enough unless you know what is more than enough”. I admire your willingness to push yourself (and your whiney inner child) to that more than enough place. Blake again…”The road of excess leads to the Palace of Wisdom.”
April 6th, 2010 at 5:30 pm
Very wise, Tony. Thanks for your words.
April 6th, 2010 at 5:32 pm
Rings true to me too. Thanks for sharing.
April 12th, 2010 at 1:58 am
Psychologically speaking, punishing, ignoring or yelling at a child makes things worse. It’s like trying to put a band-aid on a festering wound. Eventually, it has to come out in the open and be dealt with. That child wants its “needs” recognized. For some kids, it helps for someone to talk to them and explain the why’s or what-for’s. I remember as a kid what I really wanted was just some assurance that this discomfort wouldn’t last forever–or that there was some sort of purpose to it. If I was gonna suffer–at least let it be worthwhile!
It’s the same with ourselves. The whiny inner child wants to be acknowledged–to acknowledge that we’re human and uncomfortable and that what we’re doing to ourselves right now sucks. Doesn’t mean we just give in (the true meaning of “discipline” versus “punishment”)–but I think the only way we really can surpass our limitations is to do it whole-beingly.
If acknowledgment and re-assurances/logic don’t work (sometimes they don’t!!!), then a silent time-out–to re-focus and re-center–can help.
Keep it up …
… a Friendly hello from Durham Friends Meeting (NC)!