Do you have an opinion about my music? Would you like a free, signed CD?

For the month of February only, I am saying THANKS to anyone who helps me out… publish your opinion of my music online and I’ll send you a free, signed copy of my newest EP.

One of the strengths of my new website is the long list of feedback from a variety of listeners. It would be super supportive to have that kind of listener interaction on iTunes, CDbaby, personal blogs/websites and facebook pages.

Publish a review of any of my four CDs on one of those public websites and I’ll show my eternal gratefulness by sending you a FREE, SIGNED CD!!! (could it get any better?)

If you don’t own a copy of any of my CDs or haven’t heard the music, you can still help out! Listen for free at www.jonwatts.com:

• Mixed Vice Work EP | 2009
• The Art of Fully Being | 2007
• A Few Songs Occasioned | 2006
• Self | 2004

…and then tell the world what you thought!

• Post a review on one of Jon’s CDBaby pages
• or on one of his iTunes project profiles
• or in a Facebook Note (be sure to include a link to www.facebook.com/jonwattsmusic!)
• or on your own website our blog (with a link to www.jonwatts.com!)

…then just send me a message with the link to your review (include your mailing address!) and then sit back and anticipate a shiny new copy of Jon’s newest CD!!

February 2010 – Free CD offer – Details

For the month of February, 2010, post a review of any of Jon’s 4 CDs on your blog, facebook, iTunes, or CDbaby and receive a free copy (you pay only S&H) of Mixed Vice Work in the mail.

Review must be posted on a publicly-accessible site.

Reviews need not be positive, but must be substantive… at least two paragraphs long.

Email a link to your review along with your mailing address to Jon on the contact form

If you don’t currently own a Jon Watts CD, listen free online at www.jonwatts.com/listen

Here is the story of “Faded”

(as I write on each song, I will post that song online. Please feel free to listen along at www.myspace.com/jonwattsmusic)

“I’m Great”

Back when I was a camp counselor at Shiloh Quaker Camp, we often had to get creative in order to come up with afternoon activities towards the end of the Summer. Thus it was decided one afternoon that we would have a rap battle. The joy of seeing 11 year old Quaker kids battle-rapping was only supplemented by the fun of writing my own verse, which I shared at the close of the camp-wide event later on that evening.

Having always existed somewhere on the fringes of hip hop culture, I am made uncomfortable by the self-centered-ness, competetive braggadacio and put-down culture of the battle scene. Rappers freestyle insults about each other and whichever side looks less pathetic at the end of the event ascends to the next round. As a Quaker trying to “get low” and encourage the ongoing healing of those around us, the rap battle is in many ways the furthest away I could stray my faith.

There is, however, some redeeming value in virtuostic displays of self-affirmation and at Camp Shiloh I was given the opportunity to freely explore that side of my art form. I sat down with a few fellow counselors and out came the first verse of “I’m Great,” which contains some real lyrical gems:

“I’m going to bounce from this town to get a pound of mouse pals. Around smiles I frown to put down the bound styles. The ground is shaking, making fakers statement makers. Hate your neighbors. Do favors like Quaker saviors, helping people meet their makers.”

-From “I’m Great,” The Art of Fully Being

“Faded”

There was no song that I looked forward to re-mixing, re-vising and re-working more than “I’m Great.” The opportunity for full and unfettered word-play-ful-ness is so exciting! I intentionally included as many tongue twisters as possible, which makes it one of my hardest songs to perform yet:

“Bounce to the mountain top. Look in the thrift shop. Find a little nice piece of linen, living sin and for your pen top: send it in a tin top. Listen, when offense is given, that’s a thin slice of living like a gentleman. Be a gentle woman; women sending signals mixed within any silly simple little sentences.”

I changed the chorus to be a bit more inclusive:

“We’re Great. Your sedatives can’t keep us sedate, and while same sex marriage stays state-to-state, we’re going local. Pick up the mic and throw vocals in your phone book, send it to folks that you know. Look, we’re related.”

…and I wrote one of my favorite verses EVER:

“…our forefathers got lost in Boston, it’s the fault of Lord Baltimore and it’s all the more solemn for the following of psalms; some sons and daughters of the hypocrites, which, to the benefit of many, found themselves giving into sentimental money”

Whew! what fun. (try saying that out loud)

The Invitation…

“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure.

It is our light, not our darkness, that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, and fabulous?

Actually, who are you not to be?

You are a child of God. Your playing small doesn’t serve the world. There’s nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won’t feel insecure around you.

We are all meant to shine, as children do. We are born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It’s not just in some of us, it’s in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.”

-Marianne Robertson, written for Nelson Mandela

An important part of our religious movement and counter-cultural committment is to find a different way to be in relationship with the ego and all of its attachments and posturing. But simply wishing our egos away is not enough to make them dissappear.

Pretending that my ego doesn’t exist isn’t any less dangerous than ignoring my pain or my sadness. Each is a part of me, and ignoring a part of me always results in that part acting out in ways that I have no control over and am not aware of.

So I invite you, Friends, be whole. Invite your ego to speak in a safe environment and do not hate or judge yourself for what comes out. It is only when we fully accept ourselves that we can begin to lovingly shift our way of being.

in peace,
Jon

More About “Faded”

“Faded” is online and available for anyone to listen to. Visit the Listen page and find “I’m Great” on Mixed Vice Work

Mixed Vice Work can be purchased at the Store and now downloaded!

Against some unlikely odds, I have made my deadline! Today I am officially releasing my newest project: an EP called Mixed Vice Work.

Amongst much ado and hubbub, I can announce that the new EP is now available for you to hear and to own!  I have made ALL OF THE SONGS FREE FOR LISTENING at:

www.jonwatts.com/listen

…and the album is available for purchase, along with lots of other intriguing and worthwhile art at:

www.jonwatts.com/store

What’s an Ep?

An EP is a short CD.  Mixed Vice Work is 6 songs.  It’s concise, and it’s affordable.

Many Thanks

As you may know from previous newsletters, I’ve had a pretty tough two years since my last CD.  The successful completion of this EP is very significant in that it (along with my two tours this past year) shows further evidence that I have landed on my feet and am joyfully flowing forward with my life.

Many of the people in this list have been instrumental in making that possible.  I am deeply grateful to:

• Jackie Stillwell
• Frederick Martin
• Hallel Parsons
• …and all those who were loving and supportive when I had a difficult decision to make at The Meeting School
• Robyn Josephs for a place to land (spiritually, geographically)
• Walter Hjelt-Sullivan
• Niyonu Spann
• My Parents
• Michelle Martin for her hospitality when I moved to Carrboro
• The Hillsborough Road Co-op in Carrboro, NC
• A.J. Bryce for his enthusiasm and dedication to his own music and support for mine
• Chapel Hill Friends Meeting
• my support committee: Mike Green, Lauren Hart, Lynn Drake
• Sidney Martin and his Rongos
• Harriet Hart
• Maggie Harrison
• Tim Esser-Haines
• Chuck Esser and Pamela Haines
• The West Philadelphia Worship Group
• All of the Meetings and organizations that hosted me in the Fall of ’08 and Spring ’09
• Carly Frintner for being my elder, fellow poet and lover of living
• Coleman
• Ben Schilling
• Leigh Gaston
• All of those who have been interested, enthusiastic and encouraging about this project and the rest of my career as an artist.  Your support means so much.

An Appeal…

This past year I have been supported in so many ways by those around me and by those who have hosted my performances. But I can’t be traveling and performing all of the time, and this is a difficult environment to be earning a living selling recorded music. I am learning that I must be more honest and direct about asking for financial support in what I do.

I have grown beyond the point of taking it personally when my art is not well supported, but it is important to note: it is logistically impossible for me to continue making art on this scale if folks like you are not willing to pay for it.

I would ask that you please be aware that I have no benefactor. I put down my own money on the project.  If I don’t get a significant return on my investment, I can only maintain this level of output for the (very) short term.

So if my ministry has moved you in the past, or you have seen lives changed by the Spirit that moves through me, support us! The EP is just $6.95!  Consider a purchase at:

www.JonWatts.com/store

Think of it as an investment in your community!

If nothing else, it is easy for you to visit www.jonwatts.com/listen and have a listen!

Other Ways to Support

Have a look at the promotional video for Mixed Vice Work!

“This is Art and it’s important.  It’s not enough that you enjoy it.  I’m asking you to join it.”

-from “Grab a Pen”, track 4 on Mixed Vice Work

love and joy!
See you at FGC!
Jon Watts

ps Look out for the next “Stories from Mixed Vice Work,” coming in about two weeks!

But I’ve been empty
I haven’t had any love for you
the most I could do is
keep breathing
this is so painful
if we can’t sit at the same table
then I won’t know
what poison you’ve been eating

But I’m not playing it
these awful guessing games
have me trying to name the un-nameable
and now you’re running away
and I’ve stopped running at all
so I’ll just sit and face fate
and that’s a face full.

I don’t know how to tell you
anything at all
I don’t know if it would help if I was asked
so now I’m sitting, hand to chin
waiting for next fall
maybe that’s when the past will have passed

I’ve absorbed
quite a bit of nothingness
and that could mean anything
but at least now I see nothing clearly
I say to friends, no, she hasn’t said anything
maybe she doesn’t want to be near me

this is the ghost jon speaking

I never thought you’d kill me too
I guess it’s redundant to say now
that I loved you
and that I trusted you
and that my hurt and my anger
are because you
didn’t choose to
follow through

so when I come to your place
and try to say goodbye
and you don’t show your face
you just hide
why should I believe that you’re alright?
I don’t believe that.

And so I’m hurt right now
and you’ve bound up my lips
with a fear of action, loss,
fear of thoughtlessness
I was too trusting
I didn’t trust enough
and now I fall over apologies and such
son of a crutch

now you play me like a xylophone
that won’t shut up
but I’ve been silent for eight months
I’m listening to nothing
trying to make sense of
something so nonsensical
a cynic wouldn’t sense that it was coming
and start running

so now we’ve died
no one can identify the killer
I think i know the murder weapon
but I’ll leave that for September
and I’ll remember you
I’ll send this simple gift of truth to my future self
remind him that you put me through hell

I love you and I miss you but you’re not worth hell.

This is
individual, and
group consciousness.
It’s emotional and logical
abstract common sense.

This is
solidness.
it’s tangible, it’s something you can touch.
If you’re capable of loving
you can’t love too much

…and if you’re broken, this can heal you
or help you heal yourself
This is spoken word and song
and it’s only here to help.

This is art and it’s important
Support it
It’s not enough that you enjoy it
I’m asking you to join it
So if you’re listening
then grab a pen,
write a letter to yourself
or to someone else
join the conversation.
write a song or a poem
learn to let go

It’s not the end of the world
Someone else can feel it too
I’m a human being just like you
And I’m honest in this forum
this formula’s enduring
all the time and the attention it’s afforded

And it’s only getting better
as I relax and sit back
let my muse do the talking
while my brain writes the raps

You should try it
it’s been worth
every boulder
that I’ve shouldered
just to get to be an artist for another sacred moment
like playing a show out in the rain
if no one came except for Spirit
and my love for life
then that’s audience enough

Money is another story
but that story’s kind of boring
Just pay for this CD
and then no one has to worry

This is art and it’s important
Support it
It’s not enough that you enjoy it
I’m asking you to join it
So if you’re listening
then grab a pen,
write a letter to yourself
or to someone else
join the conversation.
write a song or a poem
learn to let go

this is art and it’s only here to help you get settled and express a little better what you felt, a love letter to yourself or your sadness or whatever you’ve embedded in your psyche, your community, your health. this is to your health.

Now I’m alone.
I’m just alone.
Even if you do call me,
I won’t pick up my phone.
My living situation’s
looking pretty bare bones.
I spend my time considering
the validity of my old poems.

Don’t look at me,
just look away.
You could ask me all your questions
but I won’t find much to say.
I’m not old.
this is my birth day.
My story’s not been told
because I started it today.

Listen to lies
and then speak the truth.
You don’t need to be a freedom fighter
just to have proof
that the truth is beautiful
just the way it is.
I live in condescension of these fibs.
-or-
I’ve got a living contradiction in my ribs.

This is called my summer.
Also, “things fall apart.”
It doesn’t need an introduction
or a lead guitar.
I could feel it in my body
like you might feel your heart
and it’s beating.

If I could say two words
that would live forever.
It’s: authenticity
(and then I’d think of something clever)
I’ve been having trouble speaking lately
listen to my voice.
Luckily, we all have a choice.

Listen to lies
and then speak the truth.
You don’t need to be a freedom fighter
just to have proof
that the truth is beautiful
just the way it is.
I live in condescension of these fibs.
-or-
I’ve got a living contradiction in my ribs.

We are lovers of the Truth.
And that gives us courage
because we know
We’ll find a way to love you.

Some of us are young.
Others, alcoholics.
And we all know it matters what you call it.

Listen, I’m not feeling afraid.
I’m not afraid of clarity.
If anything I’m grateful when it comes.

But I haven’t felt too clear,
and so I’m waiting with sincerity.

Illumination rises with the sun.

Bounce to the mountaintop.
Look in the thrift shops.
Find a little nice peice of linen,
living sin,
and
for your pen top,
send it in a tin top.

Listen:
when offense is given,
that’s a thin slice of living like a gentleman.

Be a gentle woman.
Women sending signals mixed within
any silly, simple little sentences.

Symptoms include:
a total lack of food

And in a bad mood,
in a sad back room
the synapses conclude
that the fad ends soon

and the mad little savages
that battle rapped
with their mavericky battle axes
entrapped within

another massive fashion magazine’s blasephemous tactics said:
“it’s just a little harrasment.”

We’re great.
Your sedatives can keep us sedate.

And while same sex marriage stays state to state
We’re going local.
Pick up the mic and throw vocals
in your phonebook. Send it to folks that you know.

look, we’re related.
Some thumbsucker’s belated
little saint thinks
the same shit is sane so we traded.

Save a bit of peace
as an interesting treat
for when you’re jaded.
Fame came late and now it’s faded.

I’m playing with my own identity.
Listening in can be free, see

Everyone is blind.
Finding their sight from behind, right
Mind the light.

And assign my problems
so someone can solve them
Look and how my hands
can’t stop these goblins

a long bomb’s falling
from the bogs of Conchord
where our fathers got lost in the fog.

Our forefathers got lost in Boston.
It’s the fault of Lord Baltimore
and it’s all the more solemn
for the following of psalms.

Some sons and daughters
of the hypocrites, which,
to the benefit of many,
found themselves giving in to sentimental money.

We’re great.
Your sedatives can keep us sedate.

And while same sex marriage stays state to state
We’re going local.
Pick up the mic and throw vocals
in your phonebook. Send it to folks that you know.

look, we’re related.
Some thumbsucker’s belated
little saint thinks
the same shit is sane so we traded.

Save a bit of peace
as an interesting treat
for when you’re jaded.
Fame came late and now it’s faded.

See but now I’m looking for my value in my breath
I’m impressed
and I’ll breath this love until my final breath is
all that’s left

I’ve got two huge lungs
and no plans,
strong hands
and I can finally say
that I’m proud to be a man

and I’ll stand for criticism
but then I’ll stand up
I’m not a living victim
I’m a talented musician

and a loving and a thoughtful friend
In the end
I’ll deserve every word of praise
that my mother gave me

When I say ‘peace’ I mean it,
when I love you can believe it
When I show you I’m a human being,
everyone can see it

Look at me
I’m a loving human being
I’m so free
and so are you
(solitude)

I can look inside
and fall in love with what I’m seeing
When I love me
then I’ll love you too

It’s Soul Food

So the confession I have
is that I’m beautiful.
And it’s my duty to know it
so I haven’t been too dutiful.

I’ve realized now
my innate value
is important
and expressing it is suitable.

I didn’t do anything to you.
It was me that I love, hate or I release
(go in peace)

So I encouraged it,
this other people loving me.
The other option looks like self-defeat
(go in peace)

In a way I would say that I did the right thing.
I tried to tell you that I liked her,
we were having a fling.

I’ll let me love hover above
this meddlesome thing
that has it’s place and dying grace in devil’s kingdoms.

It was a miscommunication
and two egos that collided.
For the part I played,
I gave apology.

I saw that you loved her.
I loved her too.

No more self-deprecating ideologies.

This is the first of a series of five brief essays reflecting on my process of writing the new EP, Mixed Vice Work. In order to help make sense of the project and in an effort to further include listeners in my process, I’ll be sharing four more in the coming months – each in reference to a specific song from the EP.

Jon Watts in the Studio for his newest EP, Mixed Vice Work.

Each essay will contain two sections: the 1st – a brief history of the old song from The Art of Fully Being that is being referenced and the 2nd – the story of how the Mixed Vice Work reflection song emerged.

Here is the story of “Grab a Pen.”

(as I write on each song, I will post that song online. Please feel free to listen along at www.myspace.com/jonwattsmusic)

“This is Just a Song.”

In the Winter of 2006-2007, I completed recording on Plateau, the album that I produced for Joshua Shelton and Bull and Mouth Records. Afterwards, I was left with my recording studio in a neighbor’s empty house, minimal instrumentation and a good deal of angst in reaction to my transitioning role in my family and my feelings of being undervalued and my work underappreciated.

In a particularly angsty moment, I retreated to my studio and layed down a dark bassline and quickly wrote a song around it, sarcastically rapping about the meaninglessness of the work that is my passion and focus.

“It’s just my voice. It’s just the core of me. It’s just as deep as you’ve ever heard me speak. It’s just some beats on a screen.”

The song was difficult and raw and I named it “This is Just a Song.”

“Grab a Pen”

In my process of reflecting on “This is Just a Song.” it occurred to me that there is a real playfulness to my tongue-in-cheek self-dismissal. There is a background vocal two-thirds of the way through the song which follows a concertina melody, in which I turned on the microphone and brazenly shouted the melody, not caring who heard me.

I began the process of writing “Grab a Pen” by focusing on this raw and unburdened noise. As I re-arranged the rest of the elements of the song, it took on a new energy. Instead of hating or trying to change the darkness that sometimes emerges when I open myself to the muse, I focused instead on celebrating the opportunity to open myself and pour out whatever I am holding.

The first verse of “This is Just a Song” hinges on the phrase “It’s not”:

(“It’s not: everybody living in the same space. It’s not: one thing you said or did that brought me to this place.”)

so I began my parallel poem by dancing around a phrase with the opposite energy,

“This IS”:”This is: an interfaith dialogue. It’s intergenerational. This is on the internet. It’s personal, sensational. This is individual and group consciousness. It’s emotional and logical, abstract common sense.”

And off I went. Given the opportunity, I gushed about the power of what I do.

“If you’re broken, this can heal you or help you heal yourself. This is spoken word and song and it’s only here to help.”

Looking back at “This is Just a Song.”, I wasn’t giving my ability to affect my own situation enough weight. While I wasn’t serious when I said “It’s just some beats on a screen,” I was dedicating my resources (my voice and my art) to focusing on the external messages that were causing me to falter in my confidence.

In “Grab a Pen,” I have adjusted my response to be more healthy and productive – dedicating my energy to giving my self the support and affirmation that I was bitterly waiting for when I wrote “This is Just a Song.”

What a powerful and insightful process! I give thanks for the wisdom and love that this piece of art has bestowed upon me.

An Invitation…

In our counter-cultural reaction to the egotism of the mainstream, we shy away from anything that could be construed as bragging. And yet we all know that verbal affirmation and reinforcement are at the foundation of a peaceful, calm and confident human being.

How often do you allow yourself to say out loud that you are good at something, or that you are important? Are you able to let go of fear that people won’t percieve you as humble and tell them that you are great and your work in the world is powerful and meaningful? (Are you able to tell yourself that?)

So I invite you, friend… affirm yourself. I expect it matters a lot to you what you think of yourself, and it is in everyone’s interest that you feel loved.

in peace
Jon